unpoetic melancholy

I nearly got into an accident today. After telling Ah Girl that I was going to pick up Ger and her parents, I got lost turning onto forrest road. And someone from a smaller junction on the left decided they wanted to turn onto the road I was on. So it was a near head on collision, and if i had not stopped in time, it sure would have been. It is a good thing I had not been driving any faster than I was going, for she stopped inches from the front of my car and we stared at each other. Strangely, no one honked. Maybe I did, but I was too scared to notice. There was a foreboding silence before I backed up and she zoomed off, claiming way to that which was not hers. Maybe she was in a hurry, but because of that, Ger had to call Adri to pick her parents up, and I went home and slept a couple of hours before waking and feeling better. Ger and Adri came over after to see how I was, and I'm only just starting to wake up a little more to this strangeness. I hate it, it feels so awful and dark.

I wonder what would have happened if I really collided with her. I wonder why I feel such a deep sadness. Did something happen to someone? Why am I so sad for no reason?

I thank God for the people around me. What a weird time this has been.

People rebel against seasons, against all things all the time- we're always fighting something: fatigue, ignorance, emotion, the physical laws of nature. And today is just another day I need to press on. But I have my secret weapons, so watch out, world. I've got a Dad that defies the natural laws of anything.