Christmas Time

I feel like it's Christmas time. All alone in my home with the music playing and the wind blowing outside, with the sunlight just right for a rusty afternoon... I feel like I'm the only person in this world alive here, in this way. I feel like the beauty of the things I loved as a child aren't lost, as if some elevator has dipped itself deep down into my heart like a dumb waiter and has re-emerged, dripping sweetness, fragrance, bearing the things I loved so much. But most of all, that feeling. That feeling of Christmas. And although I've labeled it Christmas because that is when I feel it most, it's actually something else altogether. It's the feeling of eternity, that there is life now and life later and more than life after.

I learnt something important yesterday. To be a friend doesn't just consist of being around for people when they need you and saying things they need to hear and listening to them when they want to talk- there is so much more than that because one needs to remember that being a friend consists of endorsing their needs over yours: remembering that they should come out of a meeting fulfilled and that your own fulfillment is unnecessary. And that is the Most Important thing of all. And when you reach home, you'll realise that you didn't need any kind of fulfillment: the joy of loving is good enough. And a heart-felt 'Thank You' is simply a thrilling bonus like the chocolate toffee cherried icing on a cake.