I have a cold. It's not working out so well. I don't want this cold anymore.

AUCTION

Do you need to get out of going to an event? An ex-lover's wedding, a boring seminar, or a dreaded meeting with an inquisitive old acquaintance? Or do u just want a legitimate MC?

Buy my authentic influenza virus!

It comes with:
Coughing
Nasal Congestion
Fever
Drippy Nose
Sore Throat
Aches and Pains
And as a bonus, Phlegm!

Pay by cheque or paypal. Auction starts at $5. Bid only if you live in my viscinity. I won't pay postage for a lousy virus.